I have been reading a few books on miscarriages since I lost my child. I found these books to help me understand reasons why miscarriages happen. Understanding that there was nothing that I did and there was nothing that I could do to prevent it from happening. These words are the most important for any one going through a miscarriage to understand! The second most important thing is that YOU ARE NOT ALONE! There are lots of women in this world that go through miscarriages. The tragic thing is that society doesn't talk about miscarriages. It's more a Conspiracy of Silence. Even as Women we don't talk about miscarriages to each other unless it has happened to someone we know. Even then we tend to give our apoligizes and sweep it under the carpet. It's no wonder we feel like we are alone, that other's don't understand how we feel. Don't be suprised if some of your friends and family make it more difficult for you by minimizing your loss or by not talking about it at all. Rememer until people have experienced a miscarriage themselves, they simply don't understand fully what a wrenching loss it is. They don't know that what they are saying is more hurtful than helpful.
I believe that a child is a human being at conception. My miscarriage was a "Real Loss" to me. I mourned for my child and I educated myself on the subject to help me heal. Everyone mourns for their child in some way. The length and stength of that mourning is individual. I believe that if society would recognize and validate the loss, perhaps we wouldn't hold onto the loss and have trouble working through it. If you find yourself having trouble getting through your miscarriage. Try going to the library and picking up a book. Educate yourself on miscarriages. The more I find out the better I feel each day. It has helped to talk to a few close friends who have went through this before. They understand and don't minimize my feelings...infact they helped me understand my feelings were mutal amoung other women who have had miscarriages. They helped me through some of the healing and I Thank them from the bottom of my heart! (you know who you are)
1. Coping with Miscarriage...A simple, Reassuring Guide to Emotional and Physical Healing---Luebbermann, Mimi
Coping with Miscarriage: A Simple, Reassuring Guide to Emotional & Physical Healing.
2. Women Doctor's Guide to Miscarriage...Essential Facts and Up-to-the-Minute Information on coping with Pregnancy Loss and Trying again---Friedman, Lynn and Daria, Irene
3. Our Stories of Miscarriage: Healing with Words---Faldet, Rachel
Our Stories of Miscarriage: Healing with Words
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