Do You Believe You Can Go To Heaven
If You Take Your Own Life?


Inspired by: WINGS



God Is Forgiving

I know that God is forgiving
no matter what we do.
He said we only have to ask.
I believe this to be true.
A Father wouldn't cast His child
Into the pits of hell
Knowing an action took place
At a time a mind wasn't well.
He knows our every thought
Completely through and through.
He doesn't care what others think
It's all between Him and you.
I don't think God has guidelines
Whether sins are great or small
Jesus paid the ultimate price
And forgiveness is there for us all.

Written By: Eileen Breedlove



FORGIVENESS

I used to firmly believe that those who committed suicide didn't go to heaven. At the time I believed it was amoung the most tragic of sins to throw the gift of life into God's face.

Having made the miraculous recovery from being suicidal, I have the perspective, and a more realistic belief. I say "the" perspective, because until I walked in the shoes that take one to the edge of one's own existence, I did not have the benefit (?) of knowing what all is actually involved. And I say "realistic" because assuming I knew what suicidal people actually went through before I knew for myself simply wasn't realistic. Suicidal people don't throw the gift of life in God's face. They don't believe they have a life to throw. They simply want to end the endless pain that is doing no one any good, especially their families. They don't really have a life, per se, they are the walking dead. I dare say God does not judge so harshly the chemical imbalances of the brain one cannot control, nor does He withhold mercy for those whose lives have become so tragic with unbearable pain (of any kind) that he would cast them down in their most dire hour of need.

When on the edge, I felt completely unloved, unwanted, and worthless. I was lucky to have God show Himself to me through the faces of my chidren. Some are not so lucky. I don't think God likes suicide anymore than he likes car wrecks or war. Nonetheless, I now believe God holds a special place in His kingdom for those who suffer so tragically passing from this life to the next, regardless of the road taken.

Those who, like I used to, judge the suicidal as selfish, etc., need only fall to their knees in gratitude that they themselves have never felt the complete and utter indifference to one's own existence, that they have never looked in the mirror and felt such complete contempt for what looked back that they would feel the need to pick up a gun, rope or pill bottle. Those who are suicidal honestly and sincerely believe that they are doing their loved ones a huge favor by eliminating themselves from their lives. Those who have not felt the isolation and deepest pain of self-loathing ought count their blessings that they have the miracle of awareness, the miracle of self-love. A suicidal state is every bit as difficult to recover from as terminal cancer. The miracle of recovery is still the miracle of recovery. We don't know why some recover from cancer and why some don't. And we don't know, nor should we suppose to know, why some recover from a suicidal state and some don't. The odds, statistically, are not higher for the suicidal state. It just seems that way. Remember that mental illness is still, in this enlightened millineum, held beneath contempt, seen as a weakness, rather than the illness that it is. And the few that do recover often do so without any help from family, society, or modern medicine. Once in Heaven, I believe that God bestows upon the suicidal the miracle they could not receive here on earth, for whatever reason.

Copyrighted 2000 By: Diana Hartman






Would I Go To Heaven??

When I was a little girl, five or so, I remember watching big fluffy snowflakes falling from my bedroom window for long lengths of time. My nose pressed against the window pane. I would get lost in my thoughts. I used to imagine those big fluffy snowflakes were feathers falling from Heaven because the angels were having a pillow fight. I wondered if they ever got into trouble but felt sure God didnt mind them having fun. I went to Sunday School every Sunday as it was a highlight of my life to be there learning about Heaven and Jesus. Heaven just sounded like the place that I wanted to be. I was a very lonely, unhappy child that felt I didnt belong in my family or anywhere else in life for that matter. I used to get into so much trouble for saying "I wish I was dead." Many times I thought about dying and wondering how I could do it. I didnt like it where I was and wanted to just go to Heaven where I would fit in and be happy . By the age of 7 or 8 I was asking questions about if you did something what would happen to you... checking out the How To Kill Yourself world of knowledge. Within a year or so I made my first attempt at taking my life so I could go to Heaven. It wasnt a spur of the moment thing.   It didnt work but NOBODY can tell ME if I had died I wouldnt have gone right straight to Heaven. The God I know would NOT have let me go to hell ....no way! I said on my Webpage concerning suicide that I had tried it twice. I ment to die twice but there were several shabby attempts after the first attempt. I dont think I really wanted it to work but get SOMEONES attention. OK I know you are saying by now because I was not the age of acountablity I might have made it to Heaven but what about when I was a young adult and intended to take my life to be in a better place? I was still Gods child.... Dont misinterpret what i am saying because suicide is NEVER the answer but it is hard to find your options or see any hope when you are in that state of mind. Unless you have been there you cannot judge the situation because you havent the slightest idea of the things that are going through ones mind. The desperation. Words cannot express those thoughts and feelings. Its as if you are free falling from a cliff and there is nothing you can do to stop it. I do not believe for one minute if it had worked God would have let me go to hell. He knows my heart and He knows my every thought. He knows I was not in control and my God is a forgiving God. There are however ways to "Get Control". There are always options out there and you just have to change what has to be changed to have a healthy mind. Make God the center of your life and ask Him to take control....
Talk to yourself.  
Talk to somebody.
  Whatever you do...
Stay Safe & Be Happy.

Eileen Breedlove




Nothing Is Too Hard For God

In April of 1993 my 20 year old son Bryan accidently shot his brother Marcus. As I was calling 911 to get help in all the confusion he paniced and shot his self. His last words were Mama and he pulled the trigger. I stood helpless as he died instantly. My first thought was, to cry out to God, my baby is going to hell because he killed his self. I said Father if you will just return the spirit long enough to repent, I can live with whatever happens. God did just that for me,he spoke to me and said i got him. But he also let me know our thougts are not his thoughts. He explained to me theres a difference between suicide and remorse. He said Bryan did not try to kill hisself. He was sorry for what he done. He only meant to wound himself, but it just happen to be fatal. Any time satan tries to tell me in hell, God always confirm to me in some kind of way, Satan is a liar. But if I could only speak to someone who is planning on taking their life, I would tell them please don't, because the ones left behind really suffer, Even though he was young he left behind three beautiful daughters     Two are with their mothers. I'm rasing his second daughter. Her mother died five days later from heart failure, diabeties, and kidney failure. She is 11 now but she has been in counseling behind all this from the age of for. So I advised anyone out there PLEASE PLEASE in the name of Jesus don't do this. Marcus survived and he is about to be a father any day now. Ultra sound showed it's a boy. Sorry this is so long, but what you wrote touch my heart, about heaven and hell. I wantd to tell my story to help others. Tell them for me Eileen, Nothing is too hard for God. God bless you and thanks very much.

Mamie Floyd
Jesus is the way, the truth, and light.



I BELIEVE

It is my belief that Jesus died for our sins so out God would forgive us our sins no matter what we do, i think he has a way of healing us...........maybe i am wrong but this is just the way i feel, i do believe that we make our own Hell, it is not some where we go when we die. thank you all for the wonderful words they are encouraging...... i too have chemical imbalances in the brain and that takes time to come back from as well, i never got to the point of being suicidal, i guess i am to selfish thank God for that, i want to see how life plays out and to be with the loved ones. that has always been imortant to me...........

Tammy McFarland



Its Not For Me To Judge

I am not sure of how I feel about the subject...I know the word say's "Thou shalt not kill" and to commit suicide is to kill one's self, I know that God will forgive sin if we repent, but how can one repent after they are dead? (These are all things that I have been tought.) I feel that if a person is at the stage of realy committing suicide, they are so miserable that they are not really themselves, that they are not thinking straight, their pain supercides their love of life,rather it be physical pain or mental,one is as bad as the other and we do have a very merciful God who understands things far better than we do, so I just leave it in His Hands, IT IS NOT FOR ME TO JUDGE these things, I can only hope and pray that they do go to heaven. There have been so many that God has delivered from attempted suicide, they have been given a second chance at life, some through hearing a preached word on TV right at the right time, some through being taken to the hospital and having their stomach pumped some have actually heard a "voice" telling them not to yet some have succeeded, I don't understand all things, I wish I did, I use to think I knew all the answers, everything was either black or white, now that I have experianced Life and a lot of the pain that goes with it, I am not sure of anything except that Jesus died that we may live, that is the one thing I do KNOW for sure:+)

Rita Howard



Just me in lil' ole' Alaska!
My opinion may be somewhat shocking to many of you. It perhaps may be the cause of me being expelled from this wonderful group of women, but I have come to this opinion from 58 years of living in a very large family and with many friends.
My opinion is that you DEFINITELY will go to Heaven if you take your own life. God is not a vengeful God. He knows our weaknesses and he knows our vulnerability. He is not a hateful God and he is not a God that would cause us pain. We cause our own pain right here on earth!
Sometimes, there are people who just can't handle the pain of living. Yes, there is always a way out somewhere in the future, but at the time they can't see it. Life is more than they can bear.
I know that murder is a sin, etc., etc., etc., but God is still a kind, loving God and in no way is he going to condemn unjustly when His own Son was unjustly condemned to death on this earth.
It's a little more complex than that, but my simple meager mental meanderings are all I can write at this time.
Love you all!
Carmen in Alaska




I too have given a great deal of thought to the idea. There are days I just want out. I don't like me most of the time. I truly feel I am a waste of good clean air. But, why I haven't finished the job I started so many times...I really don't know. I have lost so much trust in people. Well, actually most people. I have this constant fear of being hurt. Laugh if you want, but this is my feeling. I am never happy.. I have a constant fear and weight on my shoulders. A deep deep fear and hate.. A hate of memories. A hate of being used.. A hate of being abused. A hate of life at times..
    You know we talk about going to Hell... Well I don't think there is a Hell. I think the only Hell there is.. is right here on earth. Think of it, Pain, rape, murder, robbery, fires, auto accidents, air disasters, wars, back stabbing, so called friends not really caring, just wanting what they can get, the elderly that are forgotten in nursing homes or worse yet left to live on the streets, hunger, abortion, God fearing people that are all SHOW in the prayer line running to church every Sunday in their fine fancy clothes, just to go have a healthy drink with friends and over do it. people living as vegetables on life support, MEMORIES, betrayal, sounds a lot like a HELL to me.
SO, we die..that in itself has to be Heaven. None of the above will ever bother us again. When we lose someone. What happens? Well everyone crys. but why? Because we are going to miss them. Boy is this selfish or what? We should be happy. those are the ones that have left this Hell we call earth...YES, I have thought of suicide...more than a few times...Why haven't I succeeded? Because...because...well, I just don't want to be placed in another of those damn hospitals again.. NOW that is HELL... No..HELL is too good of a word for that place.. Undescribable is the only way I can describe that.
If this makes you upset with me, I'm sorry, but ya know something..I feel good just getting it off my chest. Sometimes just being able to talk about this stuff gives me the energy to make it.. To say.. well, Thats better, now I can go on.
Molly Offnick



I believe if you are truly liveing your life for God Whole heartedly and       Faithfully, and a tragedy like a rape or something else tramatic happens     And You commit suicide, I believe God will forgive you and you can go to heaven.. If you can Kill someone and repent and ask for forgiveness and he will forgive you and let you go to heaven, then why would'nt he forgive you for killing yourself, and let you in his Gates of Heaven.?
      This is Just a Thought
Sharron Lambkin



Through everything God IS our loving Heavenly Father. Perhaps, when we think about the emotions resulting in a Parent's heart from a child's suicide, we should ask earthly parents how they feel - and then we may see a pale reflection of Our Heavenly Father's reaction.

Another thought......would the judgmental class anorexics as suicides? On the whole it is a LOT better to try NOT to judge or pretend we know exactly what God would do......

Elizabeth Tolson



Suicide, touchy matter. Some minds you won't change but hey, glad God judges from the inside not out side like man does so here goes your answer.
1. When God started showing me insights to share with people (gift of discernment) as i walked into the church, a lady was crying as talking to pastor. This was my first time at the gift, so really loud, not knowing what I was doing, I went over to her and the two pastors and blurted out what i saw, Jesus and a young girl, as I decribed her perfectly. Later to find she had comitted sucide at age 15 or 16 can't remember now. Hump, people say those who commit suicide dont go to heaven? They better tell Jesus that cus He doesnt know he is suspose to go by mans laws!!
2. Listen closely,
You know the prophet Samuel? Well he died and went to Abrahams bossum. where people who followed God went because Jesus had not come yet. Those without God went straight to hell. and Saul called up Samuel out of there to talk to him remember the story?? Well didn't Samuel tell Saul that he (Saul) and his boys would be WITH Samuel the next day??????????? and we know Samuel wasn't in hell was he????? Remember Saul comitted suicide if you want the scripture verses contact me!
Need I say more??

Chaplain Macalynn Gore
www.geocities.com/heartland/bluffs/4381/
bible-basic instructions before leaving earth have you read my #1 best seller? there will be a test!---GOD
compassion greater than vengance-forgiveness more powerful than anger.



This message is for people like you, people who live in the darkness of turmoil. I trust it will help you to see your way, step by step, out of the shadows and into the light of God's love for you. ~ Leslie A Turvey

A LAMP UNTO MY FEET

A few years ago a man with a flashlight entered a burning house. "Follow the light," he called to the occupants, as he shone the beam up a smoke-filled stairwell. "Follow the light." With this simple instruction he was able to lead the people to safety.
Thousands of years ago the shepherd king, David of Israel wrote, "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path (Psalm 119:105)."
The energy of light is one of our most valuable assets. Even the glimmer of a tiny candle is better than groping in the dark. To the ancient seamen a light meant safe harbour, and to a weary traveller the lights of home are a welcome sight.
When David wrote, "Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path," he wasn't comparing God's words to a mega-watt search light, but with a small oil lamp that gave him enough light to see each footfall, and a bit of the pathway ahead.
When trials saturate our lives we look for a powerful light to show our way clearly out of our problems. But when we don't find it the temptation is to look to drugs, sex, alcohol, and even suicide which snuffs out any light we may have had.
God provides a light for us through the words of his holy bible. And prayer is the spark that ignites it.
Begin with prayer, not for God to take away your problems, but to light your way safely through them. It means letting go of your life, and committing it to the one who cares for you more than you even care for yourself.
 Pray to God daily, asking him to forgive every sin you've ever committed, every wrong you've done to others. Ask him to cleanse you of every evil thought, of every speck of anger, and to give you a peace-filled mind. And ask him for patience to wait for his response.
God knows what you need, and he'll give it to you when the time is right. Meanwhile, turn to the book of Psalms and read one each day. Let them be a lamp to your feet, and a light to your path.
King David's life, like yours, was plagued with problems. Many of the psalms are his prayers to God, asking for forgiveness and mercy; some are cries of despair; and others are hymns of praise.
As you pray, and study the Psalms, you'll find yourself developing a living relationship with our heavenly father, God, and you'll soon see his light clearing the shadows from your life. Be like the shepherd king and follow the light.

Bro. Leslie A Turvey
A servant of Jesus Christ







WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE?


A FEELING

There's a feeling that resides
deep within my mind.
Constant pain and suffering,
No peace is there to find.

It lingers on each waking day
And haunts me through the night.
No matter how I see my world
It's never worth the fight.

That feeling thats within me
Overshadows all things good.
It's hard to face this test of life
The way that I know I should.

What makes a person want to end
A gift so precious as life?
How could this feeling overpower me
And cut just like a knife?

I truly do not understand
As I struggle to find my way.
Why this feeling in my mind
Will never go away.

Where is the answer
To stop this endless pain?
I ache to feel a peaceful heart
And cherish life again.

I come to you in prayer Lord
Please help to set me free.
I feel to weak to take a step.
For awhile please carry me.

I need to feel your powers
deep inside my soul.
To turn it over to you Lord
Teach me to just let go.

I believe that you can do it.
I've seen it many times.
Take the darkness from deep within
And fill my soul with sunshine.

Eileen Breedlove


PLEASE, IF YOU FEEL YOU NEED HELP....GET IT




Attempted Suicide...My Friend Ruth's Story

Attempted Suicide...My Story

Home for Family Matters


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