BLASTERS REPEAT

With the victory, the Blasters' second in as many years following a three-year run by the Patches, the Boom Boxer/Ghettoblaster/Blaster franchise improved to 7-4 in the 11-year history of The JAM.

"It's nice to see things return to normal," Blasters captain and retirement planner Chris Crowley said. "Much like the NASDAQ, the Patches enjoyed a nice run in the late '90s that was based on trickery, hidden liabilities and a lot of luck. Once people realized that there was nothing behind the success, the bubble burst. Pop."

The Patches jumped out to a 2-0 lead in the bottom of the first inning on consecutive hits by Ed McDowell, rookie of the year J Alejo and George McShane. The Patches maintained this lead through two innings, causing Crowley to fear a repeat of the 1998 Notorious J.A.M., when the teams re-created the deal ball era in a 4-1 Blasters victory.

Crowley's vision of offensive futility faded in the top of the third inning, when Most Valuable JAMmer Mike Campoli smacked a two-run home run over Jeff Burritt in right field to even the score. Campoli's homer highlighted a day in which the JAM's Commissioner went 4-for-5 with three runs scored and five RBIs in earning his third Most Valuable JAMmer award and first since 1995.

To put that in perspective, there was no trophy to commemorate the MVJ at that time. And no JAM Cup.

Campoli added a fine running catch in the bottom of the first inning to rob Joe Licht of an extra-base hit and prevent the Patches from blowing the game open early.

"I was afraid of becoming the Tris Speaker of The JAM," Campoli said, alluding to the baseball Hall of Famer from the early 1900s. "I didn't want to be thought of as someone who had great moments in the past, but whose skills and talents didn't translate to the modern game."

The blast ignited and energized the Blasters, who added four runs in the top of the fourth inning and one in the top of the fifth to take a 7-2 advantage.

Playing in front of his newborn daughter, Madeline -- the youngest JAMmer and first second-generation JAMmer -- former MVJ and Columbia tight end Chris Blakely (2-for-4, triple, run) roped a triple during this stretch to clear the bases and prolong the rally.

"She [Madeline] will never get to see me line up to block on a field goal attempt against Dartmouth or in the triple tight end set against Yale, or square off against Marcellus Wiley in practice, so hopefully The JAM will allow her to witness and embrace the athletic tradition of the Blakely family," Blakely said.

Tom Dever (4-for-5, two doubles), R.T. McShane and John Licht (4-for-5) provided a potent 2-3-4 trio, and each, including second baseman Joe E. O'Leary, contributed mightily to a stellar infield defense that thwarted the Patches at every turn. Dever and McShane executed a nifty double play to end the second inning and in the eighth inning caught Joe Licht in a rundown between first and second. Licht later admitted that he only attempted to take the extra base because Patches captain Chris Spellman threatened that Licht would owe him a beer for every double he failed to hit.

R.T. recorded the Blasters' signature defensive play of the game when he made a leaping catch of a laser off the bat of his older brother George to rob the former MVJ of a sure double.

R.T.'s catch was one of two notable sibling putouts. The other occured in the third inning, when Patches alternate captain Mike Fornabaio made a nice grab behind the plate on a popup by little brother Matt.

"He's been trying to keep me down since the womb," lamented Matt, who nonetheless joined R.T. as the only JAMmers on three-game winning streaks.

Winning pitcher Big Pete Chema, who again broke his record for oldest JAMmer, contributed to the offensive outburst with a line drive to left field off Spellman. As he swung, Chema screamed out "Tomatoes," in reference to an unpleasant incident involving Spellman at the 2002 Ru-bar-B-Q.

The 61 year old Chema barely made it to first base, and Crowley inserted Eric Lord, Campoli's arch-nemesis, to pinch run. Lord scored three runs via a combination of pinch running and his own at bats. When asked about the legality of using a pinch runner for Chema every time he reached base, Campoli provided a succinct response.

"We've had people taken to the hospital from The JAM in the past, and fortunately they've all been released," Campoli said. "We'd like to keep it that way."

This was one of three hits on the afternoon for Chema, who seemed energized by the absence of his rival bitter old man, Chris "The Babe" Spellman. The legendary 100th JAMmer missed The Jam Master's JAM after three consecutive appearances due to a family wedding, to which he was allegedly dragged against his will.

"He kept asking my mom if he could avoid it [going to the wedding], but she wouldn't let him," the younger Spellman said. "He felt really bad about it."

The Babe's failure to attend the JAM was nowhere near the biggest JAM snub of 2003, though it was the most disappointing. Nine-time JAMmer Geoffrey "Balls" Bowler also did not show up, opting instead to attend the wedding of a distant family friend of his fiancée in Pennsylvania. For his actions, Bowler received the notorious Steve Testa Memorial Award, given annually to the JAMmer who turns in the softest JAM performance. Bowler's snub so moved Campoli that he took the unprecedented step of sending the award via Federal Express to the Allentown, Pa., hotel where Bowler spent the weekend. The Testa Award arrived the day before The JAM, at which time a hotel employee presented it to Bowler.

Bowler could not be reached for comment.

On a more positive note, The Jam Master's JAM saw the return of Chris Santiago after a 10-year absence, and witnessed the first appearances of, among others, Eric Lord, Eric Kabakoff, Brian Liss (2-for-3), Mark Tully and Alejo. The presence of Santiago, Tully and Alejo gave The Jam Master's JAM a true old-school feel.

Alejo provided one of the most exciting defensive plays in JAM history when he made a diving catch on a sinking line drive by Blakely just inside the left field line.

But most noteworthy of all new JAMmers was Pete Gerkin, who finally attended The JAM after turning down invitations for 10 years. Gerkin responded by breaking out his best Crash Davis impersonation, providing a running commentary behind the plate throughout the game. Unfortunately, Gerkin never antagonized Spellman into throwing a punch at him just to see which hand the veteran pitcher would use.

Sensing the game slipping away, the Patches plated two runs in the bottom of the fifth inning and one in the bottom of the sixth to cut the deficit to 7-5. The Blasters responded with 10 unanswered runs over the next three innings, increasing their lead to 17-5. Newlywed Keith Emmer collected two of his four hits during this critical stretch, and scored, along with Darlene Foster, on a bases-loaded double by Campoli in the top of the ninth. John "Double Dozen" Annese, pinch running for Chema, then scored on a base hit by Dever, and McShane plated Campoli with a single to center.

Spellman credited the Blasters for their ability to hit tough pitches and sustain rallies, but also shifted part of the blame to his defense.

"I'm blaming Vishal [Kapoor] -- and you can print that," Spellman declared, without providing any evidence to sustain his accusation.

The Patches' Rob Andrusco scored (as promised) in the bottom of the ninth, but it was not enough to keep the Blasters from drinking out of Lord Twon's JAM Cup for a second consecutive year.

"I love the Blasters," six time Blaster John Licht declared after the game in his euphoria. "I'm Ghetto to the core."

The Blasters victory prompted some traditional Patches to question their allegiance to that franchise in the future, a sentiment that Spellman, much like Byron Scott, attributed to his players' disappointment in narrowly missing victory two years in a row.

The teams then retired for the traditional post-JAM meal of ziti and Italian hero, along with a variety of JAM-related events. These included Chris Spellman beating Ed McDowell in a 40 yard dash with the latter hopping on one leg, Crowley defeating Barbara Zepeda in a 40 yard dash, "Double Dozen" Annese narrowly beating Kabakoff and Sherman in the continuing "Butting Heads" head-size challenge by displacing a freakish 24 cups of water, and Tom Dever defying the odds (and a sizable amount of money wagered by Brad Sherman) to consume one gallon of one-percent milk in 58 minutes.

"I wouldn't drive home right now," Dever chuckled after his final sip, all part of an afternoon in which he drank a combined 240 ounces of milk (128) and beer (112).

The two venerable franchises will square off for the twelfth straight year in 2004. Will the Patches rebound from this heartbreaking loss? Will the Blasters capture another victory? Will all JAM participants accidentally drown themselves in a bucket of milk?

Wait and see.

BLASTERS    002 410 325--17
PATCHES     200 021 001-- 6