Our Lord quoted from the Old Testament Scriptures when He said...

Matt 19:4-5
4 "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'
5 and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'?
(NIV)

The above can be found in Genesis 1:27 and Genesis 2:24. However, take particular note that the Lord said something else which was not found in the verses in Genesis......

Matt 19:6
6 So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
(NIV)

The verse in Genesis 2:24 is Adam's proclamation (under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit), for all of Mankind to be united in monogamous marriages (Singleness being a special calling).  Matt 19:6 is the Lord's declaration for a New Testament Believer- as God only JOINS BELIEVERS TOGETHER. Unbelievers are under the jurisdiction of the god of this world and hence do not come directly under God's jurisdiction...
 

Eph 2:1-2
1 And you He made alive, who were dead in trespasses and sins,
2 in which you once walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience,
(NKJ)
 

So in the light of Matthew Chapter 19 verse 6, MAN CANNOT SEPARATE OR DISSOLVE A CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE THAT GOD HAS PUT TOGETHER. ONLY THE LORD HIMSELF CAN DO IT AND UNDER THE FOLLOWING SCRIPTURAL CIRCUMSTANCES......

1. Death of a spouse

1 Cor 7:39
39   A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is
free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.
(NIV)

2. Divorce on the basis of the exception clause in Matthew Chapter 19:9

Matt 19:9
9    I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
(NIV) Emphasis Mine
 

A CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE COVENANT, THEREFORE,  CANNOT BE BROKEN EXCEPT FOR THE TWO SCRIPTURAL GROUNDS MENTIONED ABOVE. CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE PARTNERS WHO DIVORCE EACH OTHER (OTHER THAN FOR MARITAL UNFAITHFULNESS) AND MARRY AGAIN ARE THEREFORE COMMITTING ADULTERY.......
 

Matt 19:9
9 I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."
(NIV)
 

Mark 10:11-12
11 He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.
12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."
(NIV)
 

Luke 16:18
18 "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
(NIV)

Luke Chapter 16 verse 18 clearly indicates that the person who is not instrumental in the divorce  (i.e the woman) but marries again is ALSO guilty of adultery (RE:THE MAN WHO MARRIES A DIVORCED WOMAN COMMITS ADULTERY- hence the woman is also guilty of adultery). This is because the marriage covenant is still intact if a divorce has been carried out by either party on grounds other than that of  " marital unfaithfulness." In short, christian marriage is meant for life and God expects us to honour this concept literally.

The New Testament allows separation as can be seen from Paul's writings below...

1 Cor 7:10-11
10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
(NIV)

There are only two options for a separated christian couple- either to be reconciled or to remain unmarried. The Apostle Paul's teaching complements the teaching of our Lord in Matthew 19,
Mark 10 and Luke 16.  A christian couple separated for reasons such as mutual incompatibility  should seek counsel and prayer from godly elders. Since it is not God's will for a separated couple to divorce it would certainly be HIS WILL TO GET THEM BACK TOGETHER AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. Even if one partner has been unfaithful, it is my personal opinion that all efforts should be made for the offending party to repent and come back to his or her partner. Divorce on the ground of marital unfaithfulness should only be a last resort.

In a similar light, what about the case of a non-christian man or woman who had already divorced his or her partner and re-married again? What if this person comes to Christ? In such a case, the first few Scriptures mentioned in this article provide the Biblical guideline. It is God's will for Mankind to be united in monogamous marriages but it is a christian marriage that God HIMSELF personally JOINS TOGETHER AND WHICH HAS BEEN DECLARED INSEPARABLE BY MAN. Therefore, the non-christian who had divorced his or her partner and re-married AGAIN  has this new marriage sanctified when he or she comes to Christ (both partners must of course be in the LORD). As in the case of  any other born-again believer, this "sanctified" (christian) marriage cannot be broken except for the only ground of marital unfaithfulness. In the event that only one partner comes to the Lord, then the teaching of Apostle Paul in  1 Corinthians Chapter 7 verses 12-15 stands.
 

APPENDIX- THREE DIFFICULT QUESTIONS PERTAINING TO MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE ANSWERED.

1. CAN I DIVORCE MY HUSBAND IF HE PHYSICALLY ABUSES OR DESERTS ME?

Physical abuse is not a  Scriptural reason for divorce (although in a secular court of law this may be so). The Scriptures, however, allow a period of separation. This, I believe,
is to allow the parties concerned to be counseled by the elders and at the same time,
(for the elders) to pray for them with the objective of having them reconciled to each other.

1 Cor 7:10-11
10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
(NIV)

Desertion is also not a Biblical ground for divorce. As in the case of separation, the wife must remain unmarried (Verse 11 above) for the marriage covenant has not been dissolved in the eyes of God. If there is concrete evidence that the offending party has committed adultery then the exception clause in Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 apply.

2. I AM A CHRISTIAN AND I MARRIED A NON-CHRISTIAN. NOW I WANT TO DIVORCE HIM.

The Bible expressly forbids a Christian marrying a Non Christian. No stronger terms can be used to denounce this wilful union of two contrasting kingdoms.

2 Cor 6:14-18
14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15 What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? 16 What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."

17 "Therefore come out from them
and be separate,
      says the Lord.

Touch no unclean thing,
and I will receive you."
18 "I will be a Father to you,
and you will be my sons and daughters,
  says the Lord Almighty."
NIV

A yoke is a wooden harness which binds two oxen to a common destiny (the use of the word ‘destiny’ as opposed to ‘destination’ is deliberate). How can a worshiper of Christ and a worshiper of Baal walk together (see also Amos 3:3)? Verse 16 above says that we are the Temple of (the Living) God, and the Holy Spirit resides in us. Christian Marriage, contrary to common belief, is a tripartite arrangement where a Christian couple makes a covenant with each other in the presence of Almighty God. They essentially become “One flesh”. How could the Holy Spirit dwell in the temple of the Living God and the temple of Baal at the same time (as both of them are now one flesh)? God will only be a Father to you (1 Cor 6:18) if you heed His call for Separation and Holiness (1 Cor 6:17). Therefore, we can safely deduce that a Christian who wilfully marries a Non-Christian is essentially forsaking His Covenant with Almighty God and therefore, no longer comes under the category of “God’s Covenant People”. It is for this same reason that I cannot find Scriptural guidance pertaining to a Christian who has married a Non-Christian divorcing his or her Non-Christian spouse. The Exception clause in Matt 5:32 and 19:9 refers to a marriage covenant of God’s people only, as Jesus later said in Matt 19:6...`Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.’
The other verses which may seem to be relevant (1 Cor 7: 12-16) actually refer to two Non-Christians who married but of whom one has now become a believer (This is not the same context as our discussion above).
Pastors who marry or have married Christians with Non-Christians are walking in dangerous spiritual waters.
Since we are on this subject of being “unequally yoked”, let me just add another important point. Business and corporate partnerships of Christians with Non-Christians are definitely out of God’s Will. Christianity is a way of life founded on God’s Living Word and No Christian yoked to a Non-Christian can with any honesty say that he is walking right with God. Being ‘unequally yoked’ binds two or more persons in business to a common destiny. The Kingdom of God and the Kingdom of Satan (and that of the World) are two opposite Kingdoms with totally different terms of reference and we can only live and walk in one Kingdom at any one time.

3. MY DAUGHTER WHO IS A CHRISTIAN IS DATING A NON CHRISTIAN. WE ARE BRINGING HIM TO CHURCH.

Romance and evangelism are as far apart as heaven and hell is. The former emanates from the human soul whilst the latter is a calling and work of the Holy Spirit. Jesus did not say “Go ye into the World to bring Non Christians for your sons or daughters and make them Christians in the process.” The Biblical method of finding a mate for a Christian is to seek God’s Will and direction for your life-partner who must necessarily be a Born again Christian (the First requirement). GOD NEVER BRINGS A CHRISTIAN AND NON-CHRISTIAN TOGETHER IN A ROMANTIC ENCOUNTER SO AS TO BRING THE NON-CHRISTIAN TO SALVATION. All examples of Salvation in the New Testament have nothing to do with romance and marriage. Yes, I emphasize again, Salvation and Evangelism is a calling and work of the Holy Spirit. God never uses a human bait to ensnare an unbeliever into the Kingdom of God.

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