Furry Little Butterball Industries, Inc.
Products for the man with just a little more...!

 

Welcome to FLB Industries' new on-line store! We're here to serve you, the Russell Crowe fan at large!

Please help yourself and browse our line of fine products for your home, office, or to keep with you when on the run!

And, by popular demand, we're ecstatic to announce our NEW line of products for the man in your life - he's special, and he puts up with your Russell Crowe fixation with aplomb and grace. We are here for you so that you can be there for him!

 

Products for YOU the Russell Crowe fan!

Russell Crowe Bullshit Detector
A Beautiful Mind Keychain
BJ's Koala Deoderant
How To Pick Up Aussie Men Kit
Big Tree Stalking Suit

Products for The Man With Just a Little More!

CrowePants
Flannies
Platform Blundstones
Hanky Spankies
Chocolate Flavored Condoms

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CrowePants
#512-L-00                                                                                add to cart:

Ours exclusively!: the one, the only dual-purpose CrowePants - something to crow about indeed! The man in your life will have everyone thinking - does he or doesn't he? Don't be fooled by imitations! Our FLB CrowePants have a special crotch gusset which accommodates the more well-endowed male, while the patented hidden pouch holds a removable natural-looking silicon-gel for those needing just a little something, if needed! We even have a line of swimwear for the active man on the go! Men endowed with a complete package may order the CrowePants in regular size large, extra large, XXL, XXXL, and SPQR. But for those seeking to enhance nature's gifts, choose from these 3 popular Buddy Booster models:

The Roma Victor - #513-M-09                    add to cart:
Available in 4 sizes:
Minimus (S)
Maximus (M)
The Pax Romana (L)
The Imperial Staff (XL)

The CroweBar - #513-M-17                        add to cart:
Available in 4 sizes:
Bud's Bud (S)
Romp n' Stomp (M)
Hando's Handle (L)
The Wigand Wonder (XL)

No-Ruse Cruise Missile - #513-M-22        add to cart:
Available in 5 sizes:
Risque Business (S)
Cocktail (M)
The Firm (L)
Top Gun (XL)
Legend (massive)

CrowePants - $39.95
Buddy Boosters - $29.95 (all sizes over L - $39.95)

Flannies
#721-FL-99                                            add to cart:

You know you've been dying to buy flannies for your significant other, and FLB Industries has them in stock! Soft, durable, washable, comfortable, versatile - what more could you ask of a garment? Available in Indigo Blue, Midnight Blue, Azure Blue, Sail the Same Oceans Blue, Blue Bayou, and Marine Blue. $23.99
Special: buy any two flannies, and get a Canon t-shirt - FREE!

 

Platform Blundstones
#958-U-36                          add to cart:

They're here! Manufactured exclusively for Russell Crowe's fans, the FLB Platform Blunnie was designed especially for the height-challenged man in your life! While the tabloid stories regarding Russell's "short" physique were greatly exaggerated, our designers at FLB fashioned Russell's favorite workboot into a foot tool that would put a smile on even Danny DeVito's face! Our Blunnie can increase a man's stature from 5'6" to just under 6 foot and any height in between!
Sometimes a man just needs to be able to rise above the muck.   $59.95
buy now and get a free pair of matching white anklets!

see more Blunnies at the official Blundstone site!

Russell Crowe Bullshit Detector
#113-BS-51                                add to cart:

Intelligent gadget that works hard for you in 3 different ways: as a scanner so that you can detect bullshit when reading newspaper or tabloid articles; as a recorder that sounds a subtle beep when people are humoring you when discussing Russell Crowe; as a laser SmartPen for scanning your monitor when reading posts on a Russell Crowe message board or email list - this can really come in handy when faced with Serious All-Out Bodacious Bullshit.
$19.95 (get 2 for $29.95)

A Beautiful Mind Keychain
#211-P-6                                      add to cart:

Ever have a panicky moment away from your keyboard, when you need desperately to discuss Russell Crowe, if only for a moment or two, and found you were surrounded by outsiders who just don't get it? Well, here's the intelligent way for Russell Crowe fans to find each other in a crowd, or just by chance: the Beautiful Mind Keychain, the radar device that has a mind of its own. This keychain lights up or beeps (your option) whenever two BM keychains occupy a 30 foot radius. Never be alone again!   $11.95
Hanky Spankies*
#107-J-19                                                     add to cart:

Husband home alone while you're still at work posting to a Russell Crowe message board or chat room? Or is he just tired of waiting for you to get off "that goddamn computer!" and join him in bed? Well, there's no better gift of love a wife can give her man than a hefty supply of Hanky Spankies! He'll appreciate how the Spankie takes the mess out of spanking with it's cool cotton air-flow exterior, smooth-glide interior, and easy washing instructions. And he'll really love how this discreet, reusable 100% stretch cotton sleeve fits into his wallet, handy for those nights when he's working late at the office surfing Jennifer Lopez sites! Comes with a 35-page instruction manual, plus a specially developed detergent to keep his spankies fresh, clean and good as new! Available in solids or multicolor prints:

SOLIDS:
Buddy White, Bananarama, Mango, Bulging Blue, Pokemon Purple, Rawhide, Burnt Wood 		PRINTS:
Guns n' Roses, Leopard Skin, Lush Jungle Fever, Passion Fruit, Tool Kit, Flower Power

Special if you order now: FREE 5-Pak of Egyptian Silkies!
Package of 50 $19.95
Package of 100 $35.95 you save $5!
Package of 250 $69.95 you save $20!
Lifetime supply - call our office today! 1-800-HAV-ATIT
(please specify color when ordering)

Chocolate-Covered Condoms
#553-G-74                                              add to cart:

Is your man's gift a little hard to swallow? Be safe and sane with FLB's special chocolate-flavored condoms. Special design allows for comfort with stay-put no-choke elastic band. Sugar- and lactose-free! Your choice of rich deep chocolate flavor ("Tootsie Pop"), milk chocolate ("Treat Me Like Chocolate") or white chocolate ("Cafe au Lait"). Comes in a convenient 144-count box. Also available in "I'm With the Band!" party packs - contact our Bulk Sales Dept. at 1-800-HAV-ATIT for more information!

Box of 72 $19.95
Box of 144 $29.95
I'm With the Band Party Pak $49.95

BJ's Koala Deodorant
#803-Z-18                                            add to cart:

Koalas - they're cuuuute and cuddly but stinky! Get a little koala funk on your hands and you'll carry it with you all day no matter how many times you wash up. Solution: BJ's special Koala Deodorant, a fragrant blend of eucalyptus, orange, and tea tree oils. Inspected and approved by the Australian SPA. Order NOW and receive FREE our special elbow-length steel-mesh-lined leather gloves for use in applying to your koala. $3.95

 

NEW!!!
The How to Pick Up Aussie Men Kit
#577-J-42                                                   add to cart:

Plan on traveling to Australia in the near future? Or are you just into Aussie bands? Here's a product just for you! FLB's convenient travel pack includes a six-pack of VB, the best-seller 101 Tasteless Jokes About New Zealand, 20 feet of strong hemp rope, a can of snake repellent (inspected and approved by the Australian SPA), and 4 ounces of BJ's Koala Deodorant.   $29.95
Big Tree Stalking Suit
New and Improved!!!
#473-L-93                             add to cart:

Want to follow your favorite film star and admire him from afar without his seeing you around every corner? Avoid that ugly "stalker" image and invest in our Big Tree Stalking Suit. Our new and improved model now includes 2 eye-holes instead of one (thereby cutting down on those nasty bruises), and is now provided with movable branches to allow access to buildings. Now available in Cedar, Pine, Oak and Apple Blossom (replaces the old shrub model). It may dent your pocketbook a bit, but well worth the expense.    $299.95
Sta-put life-like bird, an additional $10.95

Out of stock / no longer available:


MegaBlockers
#CAB2-0-51
Movie-viewing glasses designed to block out unwanted co-stars without having to cover one eye! Also available in 3-D for split performances or, for that particularly bad showing, try our new Oblique model! $18.95

And for our intimate products designed by our cracked team of engineers and designers especially for YOU, browse our complete line of products at www.FurryLittleButterball.com

BIG  GIGUNDI  HUMUNGOUS DISCLAIMER: ...uhm...well...! Sometimes there's just nothing to say.

*As far as the Spankies are concerned... er... there's just no way around it, is there? Go here.

Disclaimer to the disclaimer...this site administrator had ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with the idea or manufacture of the Chili Pepper...NOTHING. However...it did take several hours to recover from reading about the other products to be found at the above link. My personal favorites are the Toy Cleanser, the Monkey T-shirt, and the Mini-Pearl. That's all I'm gonna say about that. Make sure you have emptied your bladder before clicking on that link. You have been warned. I'm serious.

Disclaimer to the disclaimer to the disclaimer...neither this site administrator, nor her partner in crime ChoChoSan, nor any of the cracked designers who worked so hard to bring you these handy FLB creations, use ANY of the products to be found at the above mentioned Spankies.com link. As far as I know. I SWEAR.

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